


another night you wish you could forget

by goldenbadwolf (tempestu0us)



Series: you can sing to it, dance to it, fall in love with it. [6]
Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Beginnings, Developing Relationship, F/M, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, LGBTQ Themes, Light Angst, Romance, Song Lyrics, Song: True Trans Soul Rebel (Against Me!), Trans Clara Oswald, Trans Female Character, Trans Male Character, Trans Twelfth Doctor, Transgender
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-31
Updated: 2020-03-31
Packaged: 2021-02-28 22:21:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,269
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23414494
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tempestu0us/pseuds/goldenbadwolf
Summary: He had a bad night. The discomfort he had with himself was beginning to grow higher as he waited for things to change. Luckily, Rose Tyler showed him the value of letting time take it's course.
Relationships: Jack Harkness & Rose Tyler, Jackie Tyler/Pete Tyler, The Doctor (Doctor Who)/Rose Tyler, Twelfth Doctor & Clara Oswin Oswald, Twelfth Doctor & Donna Noble, Twelfth Doctor/Rose Tyler
Series: you can sing to it, dance to it, fall in love with it. [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1494587
Comments: 2
Kudos: 17





	another night you wish you could forget

**Author's Note:**

  * For [doctorwhos](https://archiveofourown.org/users/doctorwhos/gifts).



> for atlas because we yearn for the same content.
> 
> also because it is tdov.
> 
> warnings for dysphoria talk!
> 
> song: true trans soul rebel by against me!

_Who's gonna take you home tonight?_

_Who's gonna take you home?_

_Does god bless your transsexual heart_

_True Trans Soul Rebel?_

* * *

He had been riding his bike through the country. Quite recklessly, Donna would add. It wasn’t anyone’s fault. Well, outside of his own. He knew all his wild fantasies always seemed to crash. No matter how sure and beautiful. No matter how realistic he made them.

He could tell himself that these things were possible. They all laid out in front of him; every opportunity to become what he wanted, to fall in love. They were right there. But time and money made it seem so unreachable.

And this argument of realism and skepticism rattled his mind. Making him feel like he was arguing with himself in the mirror. This argument, that he didn't know how long would last, would often be the only thing making noise in his mind.

It didn’t seem to matter, the noise. The radio turned to max, the engine revving. The wind beating against his helmet like his angry heart in his chest. The escape for freedom fought all it could. But those doubtful, jealous thoughts always creeped back into his mind. Somehow being so much louder than before he tried to rid of them.

Donna had taught him the trick of naming things he loved about himself. Things he was comfortable with. His hair, his smile, his hands. But after a bad night bartending and no sleep for two days, it only seemed to aggravate him more.

So he drove mindlessly, through the roads he knew like the back of his hand. Hoping the rain caught in his wind would sculpt him back to something smooth.

* * *

He was back in London by sunrise. Yet still too restless to sleep. The tension still held in his spine, but gave up the grip it had on his shoulders and jaw. He felt like he could breathe again. Like he wasn't attempting to mold himself into something he wasn't.

He found himself in Greenwich Park. Watching people walk dogs, coddle children, relax in the morning breeze. He realized they probably saw him as what he wanted. 

He was just another visitor, taking the day off in the park. His jaw and shoulders weren’t too soft. They became angled and strong. His frame wasn’t curvy but wiry- skin and bones, Clara often said. He wasn’t the image that embedded itself into his head after years of living under false skin. He reminded himself that whenever someone acknowledged him.

Between people watching and scribbling in his journal, he found himself drifting off. Wary eyelids growing heavy as the clouds once again found their place in the sky. It was the type of chill that made one realize how warm they were. He fell asleep clutching his journal, earbuds playing loud enough for others to hear if they came close enough. 

He woke up to the squeal of a toddler and the shout of a girl. 

“Tony! Don't you dare!"

When he opened his eyes, he saw a blonde dash towards a toddler making his way toward a pond. He chuckled and began closing his eyes again, until he spotted a yorkie running his direction. The opposite of where the blonde had originally been standing. 

He kept the dog from running past hi by grabbing its leash. Scooping her up, not thinking twice as she nipped at his fingers. And he made his way to the blonde that was carrying a boy, he could overhear her lecture of getting them both in trouble.  
“I think you lost control of something else,” He offered her with a grin, holding out the yorkie.

“Oh! Rose!” She looked around a moment, “D’you think you can just set her down and hand me the leash? I’ve sorta got my hands full.”

She looked sheepish as she bounced the boy on her hip. 

He did as she asked, but didn’t walk away. He didn't know why. But he wanted to talk to her.

“You really do have your hands full don’t you?” He let out an awkward chuckle with the question. Hoping she wouldn’t try and walk off.

She snorted, “Yeah. You look the opposite of me though, nappin’ over on a bench.”

He felt the heat creep onto his cheeks and shrugged, “My off day. Normally spend them out here.”

"I could hear your music when we walked by you."

He felt a trademark wave of arrogance come over him, "So you've been watching me?"

She didn't bat an eye at it. Which only fueled his sudden intentions. Ones that he still couldn't figure out what they were aiming for.

“What’s your name then?” She sounded confident. She already knew his game. The grin she gave him was devilish. Because she already had an answer.

Or so she thought.

“Disco.”

And she reacted exactly how he expected her to. There was the confusion, as if to make sure she didn’t mishear. Then the questioning of _how_. And then the scoff of disbelief.

“Come off it, mate, I won’t believe it for a second.”

“It’s true!” He smirked, “I’ll even show you my license!”

She was about to rebuttle when the boy tugged on the corner of her collar, “Rosie! Look!”

He pointed off towards some ducks making their way into the pond as Rose turned a deep shade of pink.

“Disco sounds less ridiculous than naming your dog after yourself. Unless, Tony has the two of you confused.”

“It’s a story.”

He checked his watch, “Well, I have until four pm tomorrow if it’s a long one.”

* * *

That is how he ended up outside a chip shop with Rose Tyler that afternoon. Rose the dog napping in her lap. Holding her little brother, who was only kept occupied with his hands in John’s hair. Something about the curls seemed to fascinate children. That's what he said as a slight hue of pink returned when Tony asked to sit next to him.

“So a Scotsman named John Disco Noble. How does that exactly occur?” She said, smiling as she popped a chip into her mouth.

And it slipped before he thought twice, “Happens when you’re drunk and make a bet then have an appointment to legally change your name the next morning.”

She hummed, “Why the name change, already divorced or somethin’?”

“Uh, no.” The words got caught in his throat. Afraid what question she might ask next question, he switched the focus from him, “How exactly do you name a dog after yourself?”

Rose rolled her eyes. He could tell that she's told the story several times. Saying it in monotone.

“I was probably three or four when we got her. My dad started a joke with my mum that we should have two Roses in the house. So when my mum called the name she’d get twice the excitement.” Rose glanced at the dog in her lap, “Apparently, I took it seriously. She doesn’t _normally_ get called Rose. Typically just Ro.”

"Dad jokes can really get you, can't they?"

She snorted, "Yeah. Especially his."

A silence settled over them. They both had to keep Tony from grabbing John's hair with greasy, salty hands. Something Rose laughed at when she saw his face the first time her brother attempted the act. 

John's retaliation came with a ending he was quite satisfied with.

“You going to continue the tradition with him?” John asked nodding toward Tony, “Could call the dog Ty!”

She rolled her eyes, “That’d be something else I’d have to keep up with on my off days.”

“Oh, I could help.”

**Author's Note:**

> i'm really not sure how long this is gonna be. i'm planning at least one more chapter but we will see. i didn't expect to have so much inspiration for this.
> 
> hope you enjoyed!
> 
> [find me on tumblr!](https://goldenbadwolf.tumblr.com/)


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